Let me introduce myself and bring you on my journey as to how I ended up here as a resilience and life coach.
My name is Justine Murray (aka lighter.step.justine). I have lived a challenging and diverse life filled with triumphs and failures, incredible adventures and stagnant periods. I have experienced the entire emotional rollercoaster from exhilaration to utter despair. But I never gave up!
My life in a nutshell:
My mother had a crippling form of multiple sclerosis from the time I was born. I therefore missed out on a lot of the nurturing milestones necessary for a child in the early formative years. I only have two memories of her in the wheelchair and when she spilt boiling peas on herself while alone cooking dinner for us three kids, and the courage she showed in keeping calm so not to scare us. She died when I was five (she was only 26). Not long after, I had a challenging upbringing in a physically and mentally abusive relationship for ten years with a new step parent; as well as a parent that failed to protect me. I remember never feeling safe but thinking I was not good enough to be saved. I failed my last years of school as I started to rebel from my strict upbringing. I got sacked from one of my first jobs. I felt like a failure. I have had many jobs, from jillaroo, to horse groom, to hospitality, to nursery worker, to cleaning houses to becoming a research scientist. I have been homeless and had health issues, where I was told I could be bed-ridden and die in 10 years. I started to fight back and retake my life. I wanted to prove I was good enough and now I did not need saving. Having numerous dices with death from stupidity as a teenager/young adult, being told I could die and not amount to anything spurred me to make something of my life. I became a knowledge seeker. I have travelled to over 50 countries, mostly solo, immersing myself to experience the real world, embracing Indigenous cultures and their lessons. From failing school, I have a degree in anthropology, an Honours degree in biological sciences (ecology), a graduate certificate in community development, and a PhD in conservation. I was a sole parent for 10 years while studying at university. Then I took on a role as step mum to two little girls that had also lost their mother, when I met my partner and we became a blended family. It was not easy. But I was still trying to prove I was good enough.
After completing my PhD, I got my dream job working in a leading science organization. I thought I was set. With my high achievement drive and motivation, I would work my way up the ranks, participating in great work projects aligned to my passion while making a name for myself. That did not happen. I have been 14 years working in this organisation, and five years ago I hit rock-bottom......
I was being micro-managed and my views in meetings were frequently disregarded. I was often treated in a narcissist manner by my boss. I was continually questioned on my work but never praised. I started to doubt myself and the value I brought. Imposter syndrome set in and I shrunk in a protective shell hoping no one would notice I was a fraud and should not be there in this innovative science environment. This made me make mistakes and the cycle perpetuated. I was a mess. Again, I was looking for someone to save me but nobody came. I was so stressed, it affected my home life. My family needed me but I had nothing to give. I knew I had reached my rock-bottom when my normal optimistic self became a pessimist. Enough was enough! That scared me so I started fighting back. I had to save myself!
I started working on my own personal development, reading self-help books and listening to hours of great podcasts on self-improvement from prominent speakers and coaches, such as Brené Brown, Mel Robbins, Brendon Burchard and Rob Dial. I let the information sink in and started to change. I applied for a global women's leadership program Homeward Bound last minute, believing I never had a chance. However, I was chosen as one of 100 women in that year's cohort. This was the boost I needed. Some people saw my 'value' and chose me to be part of the initiative. From this, I was encouraged to 'embrace my value' and seek a new pathway. It did not happen overnight, or even in a week. It has taken months, even years - but eventually I am where I want to be.
My journey made me aware I could help others going through similar situations. I decided to help others find their authentic self and embrace their value. I have completed a number of coaching courses developed by global leading coaches; and I have found my own niche and style. I have spent hours of study, on top of my life experiences, to offer you a unique perspective that you can benefit without having to put in all that time yourself.
I believe everyone has value that they bring to each unique situation in life. Instead of burying it and conforming to what others expect, embrace your value and thrive.
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